Ian Ziering ( Ian Ziering )

Fin Shepard

Tara Reid ( Tara Reid )

April Shepard

Cassandra Scerbo ( Cassandra Scerbo )

Nova Clarke

Vivica A. Fox ( Vivica A. Fox )

Skye

Judah Friedlander ( Judah Friedlander )

Bryan

Debra Wilson ( Debra Wilson )

New Bryan

Alaska Thunderfuck ( Alaska Thunderfuck )

Morgana

Neil deGrasse Tyson ( Neil deGrasse Tyson )

Merlin

Marina Sirtis ( Marina Sirtis )

Winter

Leslie Jordan ( Leslie Jordan )

Benjamin Franklin

Darrell Hammond ( Darrell Hammond )

George Washington

Ben Stein ( Ben Stein )

Alexander Hamilton

Roy Taylor ( Roy Taylor )

Jebediah Clarke

Dexter Holland ( Dexter Holland )

British Captain

Kevin ‘Noodles’ Wasserman ( Kevin ‘Noodles’ Wasserman )

British First Mate

Constantin Viscreanu ( Constantin Viscreanu )

Paul Revere

Dee Snider ( Dee Snider )

Sheriff

Jonathan Bennett ( Jonathan Bennett )

Billy the Kid

Chris Owen ( Chris Owen )

Thirty-Year-Old Gil

James Murray ( James Murray )

Eastwood

Gilbert Gottfried ( Gilbert Gottfried )

Rand McDonald

Tori Spelling ( Tori Spelling )

Raye Martin

Dean McDermott ( Dean McDermott )

Gilly Shepard

Benjy Bronk ( Benjy Bronk )

Connor Beale

Christopher Knight ( Christopher Knight )

Grandpa Clarke

Catarina Scerbo ( Catarina Scerbo )

Young Nova

Bernie Kopell ( Bernie Kopell )

Charter Boat Captain

Chuck Hittinger ( Chuck Hittinger )

Matt Shepard

Ryan Whitney ( Ryan Whitney )

Claudia Shepard

Israel Sáez de Miguel ( Israel Sáez de Miguel )

Captain Santiago

Marcus Choi ( Marcus Choi )

Palmer

Alexandre Ottoni ( Alexandre Ottoni )

Azzinaro

La Toya Jackson ( La Toya Jackson )

Cleopatra

James Hong ( James Hong )

Confucius

Eileen Davidson ( Eileen Davidson )

Marie Antoinette

Shad Gaspard ( Shad Gaspard )

Muhammad Ali

Jayson Paul ( Jayson Paul )

Joe Lewis

Kato Kaelin ( Kato Kaelin )

Viking King

Patrick Labyorteaux ( Patrick Labyorteaux )

Caesar

Sharon Desiree ( Sharon Desiree )

Joan of Arc

Bo Derek ( Bo Derek )

May

Gary Busey ( Gary Busey )

Wilford Wexler

Mark McGrath ( Mark McGrath )

Martin

Masiela Lusha ( Masiela Lusha )

Gemini

Al Roker ( Al Roker )

Al Roker

John Heard ( John Heard )

George (archive footage)

Anthony C. Ferrante ( Anthony C. Ferrante )

Quint Singer

Robbie Rist ( Robbie Rist )

Quint Guitarist

Tammy Klein ( Tammy Klein )

1950s Dancer

Roxanna Bina ( Roxanna Bina )

1950s Dancer

Raine Michaels ( Raine Michaels )

Girl in Bikini

M. Steven Felty ( M. Steven Felty )

Hologram Gil (voice) / D. Brown

Andrei Olteanu ( Andrei Olteanu )

Frodo

Chris Ridenhour ( Chris Ridenhour )

Townsperson

Thunder Levin ( Thunder Levin )

Bar Patron

Tiberiu Harsan ( Tiberiu Harsan )

Medieval Gil

Brendan Petrizzo ( Brendan Petrizzo )

Hologram Gil

Katarína Paveleková ( Katarína Paveleková )

Background

Erik Adkins ( Erik Adkins )

Petunia ( Petunia )

Petunia